Amazing Stories About Some Amazing Young People

I’ve been thinking through what I’m going to say at the new “Neos” conference - a conference designed to "Equip all for family, youth + children's ministry". 

Aside from some sessions in the Additional Needs Alliance stream, I’ve been asked to do a 7 minute “Quick Insight” on additional needs.

What can I say in 7 minutes? 

What I want to do is to be positive!

Then I felt a blog post ‘coming on’. It wrote itself whilst I was in the bath…..! (I do some of my best thinking whilst in the bath!)

Update On How Our Prayer Activities Went

We’ve finally come to the end of a busy Summer of camps and conferences, so hopefully I should be writing a few more blogs in the coming months!

As you will know from previous blogs, we did the Beatitudes with two of the groups we worked with - quite an ambitious teaching programme!

I thought I’d let you know how the prayer activities worked.

The two groups were very different, and the selection of children within these groups was quite diverse as well! But all the activities seemed to work well in different ways.

The first group was a camp for 9 - 11 year olds (Our church camp, “Activate” at Hungarton), The children were from different backgrounds, with different abilities and many from totally unchurched backgrounds. We also had a couple of children on the autistic spectrum - so the challenge to explain everything clearly in a way they could connect with needed to be met.

The next was a group of well taught children from families who are involved in full time ministry. They were aged 5 - 13(!) Their ability was wide ranging, from a 5 year old who listened best when ‘sitting’ upside down on a chair with her legs in the air and head hanging, to a 13 year old who spoke English as her third language! Challenging in a lovely way.

Below are the links to each activity, and the update will be at the bottom of each of those pages.

Poor in Spirit - Zip Prayers

Those Who Mourn - Fizzy Prayers

The Meek - Explosive prayers

Hunger and Thirst For Righteousness - Scrabble prayers

Merciful - Speech bubble prayers

Blessed Are The Poor In Spirit - Zip Prayers

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 5 v 3

Being poor in spirit is all about knowing you need God - the opposite is being arrogant, ‘full of yourself’, and thinking you can do things on your own and in your own way.

In this prayer activity, the zip represents where we are with God.

Zips pull things close together, so a completely closed zip means we are close to Him and fully reliant on Him. (Remember the ‘Frog’ bracelets!)

If the Zip is completely open - then that means are fully reliant on ourselves and God doesn’t get a look in.

Using the zip, think about how you rely on God.

There are lots of degrees of this - you may believe in God but still live as though you can do life without Him - so your zip could be at any point in between.

POST SUMMER UPDATE: How did it go?

Because this was a bit of a tenuous link I was doubtful that all would get it, but they seemed to. Whilst I was talking about it on camp and summarising the talk with the zip, something occurred to me. Zips on jeans have a ‘lock’ mechanism - if the tab is pushed all the way down, it locks the zip at the top. So I used this to talk about staying close to God and recognising how much we need to stay close to God. 

How do you lock your “Spiritual” zip? Keep talking to Him and reading the Bible are just two things you can do!

I took great care in explaining this activity - and all, with a couple of exceptions, seemed to get it. 

The couple of exceptions were children who were over tired and grumpy. The first night on camps and conferences are always bad for children! But even they got it by the middle of the week.

On camp, there was an added bonus……

We had a some children who were bordering on ADHD. Having told the campers to keep the zip in their Bibles, I noticed that for the rest of the week they would sit and fiddle with it during the ‘talky’ bits in the meetings thus helping them to listen. I also noticed a few leaders doing the same during the day - it appeared to be a good stress reliever too!

For the conference, I was worried if our 5 and 6 year olds would get it, but on chatting to parents it seems the children managed to explain it to them word for word!

There is always the problem of zips left behind - but I hope that getting dressed in the morning and ready for bed at night will bring this teaching to mind.

This had the unusual novelty factor of using a trouser fly zip to teach about God!

(Do Check out the other prayer activities, and the introductory blog to this series)

Beatitude Prayer Activities

Those who follow me on Twitter or Facebook will have seen my comments on purchasing strange things for creative prayer activities.

When we teach, we like to do a creative prayer that causes the children to stop and think about what they have heard and pray about how they can apply the teaching in their own lives.

We like these activities to be memorable, either using things the children will come across regularly or are so outrageous - they'll just recall them in those quiet moments when their minds wander.

I'm going to put some of them on here - just to spark a few ideas with folk who are (like me) keen to encourage both prayer and the application of Bible truth.

On camp this year we'll be looking at the Beatitudes. 

It's been tough preparing as I believe we often dumb down what these verses mean - turning them into a very light weight idea with wishy washy terminology. It's been tough because I want the children to have to full picture - not the 'pretty' version I was given as a child.

In our desire to make them understandable to children we have been guilty in watering them down by using words that culturally mean different things today - we've made them 'nice' rather than revolutionary.

The fact is - these words are hard hitting, active words that tell us how to live a Godly life. They are counter cultural and when applied will cause a revolution. There is nothing weak about them - they show strength in every area of our lives.

I'm up for starting a God revolution...... what about you? Care to join me?

Note: I won't be sharing them in order - I'm writing them up in the order the props arrive in the post!

Enjoy :o)

Perfectionism vs Caring Community

We're in the 21st Century, and in 'The Church', families who have children with additional needs are still being asked to leave because the church can't cope with them. If they are not asked to leave, they are left to struggle.

That probably sounds a bit harsh, but sadly it is true.

Let's look at how the meeting of Church and the 21st century is affecting those with disabilities:

A couple of years ago churches didn't think anything of having sound 'dead spots' in their main meeting room - which was a huge help to those who can't cope with sensory overload. But now, with the dawn of more advanced sound systems these 'dead spots' are frowned upon in the pursuit of a concert style sound (That is often louder than actually needed). If any one with autism, tinnitus or other conditions that don't cope with surround sound ask for a dead spot area, they are frowned upon because "It might ruin the experience for others". 

The fact that those 'others' don't notice a problem is incidental, as is the possibility that a young person with an Autistic Spectrum Disorder/Aspergers has been caused to run crying into the toilet to escape the sound.

In an attempt to make things visually more 'exciting' we have moving back grounds on screens where the song words are, making it impossible for many to read the words.

In an attempt to make worship 'flow' we don't announce which song is coming next meaning some with specific disabilities can't find the next song in the large print song book until it's nearly finished….. that's if there is a large print song book!

Caring for others, including those with disabilities is getting more and more lost in a sea of  so called improvements that make us more like the world but make our communities and our meetings less accessible. The need for perfection comes ahead of the need of the people. 

And that's just the tip of the iceberg - for a person with a disability or additional need, whether they be an adult or child, Church is a difficult place to be and often a scary place.

It's because of this that I write about disability and the church. It's the reason that I shout and scream (and metaphorically stamp my feet) on Twitter and Facebook 

God put the idea that church should be accessible on my heart when I was 14 and volunteering on a camp for children who have disabilities…. a long time before I became disabled by some genetic quirk of muscles and neurology. I didn't find out that I had the conditions I have until I was 19 and training to be a nurse.

Many people think I campaign because I am disabled…. but I've only been using a wheelchair for a small number of years. I say this because some have levelled the accusation at me that I'm only campaigning to make life better for me. This is most definitely not true.

I campaign because I want everyone to be able to access the Gospel - no matter what form that access has to be. I am most passionate about children with disabilities and additional needs, but I also campaign for adults. It is pure co-incidence that I am now experiencing what I have been campaigning about.

I have found that if I give a talk or train people when sitting down - especially in a wheelchair, people don't take me as seriously as when I stand to speak….. why is that? Does my wheelchair take my brain away? This is why I plan pain medications to make sure I can stand - which surprised a few people at the last conference I spoke at. It wasn't the standing to speak that surprised them, but the fact that they later saw me in a wheelchair!

There are so many campaigns out there - lots of them wonderful and valid campaigns. They often get a great following. But I am left slightly bewildered by the fact that saving badgers gets more support than disability discrimination awareness!

In all the hard work and heart and soul I put into this campaigning, my 'head' tells me to give up, because it is obvious that majority of 'The Church' really couldn't give a stuff about it. But my heart tells me to keep going, because every so often it makes a small difference to one child or their family - a small difference in our eyes, but a huge difference in theirs.

What I do isn't about me - it's about kids and their families, it's about all those people who need to hear about the Love of Jesus but can't. It's about the care that Jesus tells us to have.

If Jesus was visiting some our churches, I don't think He would be in the main meeting….. I believe He would be in the toilet comforting that young person who couldn't cope with the noise.

Additional Needs Alliance

Last weekend we had our first “Additional Needs Alliance” Forum.

It was a great success! Just over 50 people of like mind together in one room. 

The speakers were: Mark Arnold from Urban Saints. Me (Kay Morgan-Gurr) from Children Worldwide, and Paul Nash of the Paediatric Chaplaincy Network. There were others who came to help facilitate different areas of discussion.

The forum fed into the Children and Family Ministry conference (Hand in Hand), with the Friday night plenary being about “A Vision for Inclusivity” and an additional needs work seminar stream running throughout the weekend. This was also a great success.

What is the 'Additional Needs Alliance'?

The Alliance isn’t another organisation out to ‘get at’ churches. It’s primary aim isn’t campaigning but rather getting alongside people and churches to raise awareness in the area of working with children who have additional needs and disabilities. Ok, so some might see what we do as campaigning…..but that's just a side effect of our passion!

What we are aiming to do is start a conversation about how we care for children and families who are affected by the huge breadth of additional needs and disabilities out there. To raise a vision beyond just ‘catering’ for these children to creating a place where they and their families feel they belong and are wanted. We want churches to say yes to families who are so used to hearing ‘no’ when they ask if a church can cope with their child’s needs.

One of the things we have looked at is the vision for the spiritual walk of these children, their faith journey with God. We know they can have relationship with God - it may challenge how we view and understand faith, but we know that God understands and the power of the Holy Spirit works beyond our understanding. We believe the faith journey of these children should be a fundamental part of our vision.

1 in 5 children in this country having some form of additional need or disability, and it is obvious this number is not reflected in our churches.

There are small pockets of excellent work out there, usually stemming from people already in our church communities having children with additional needs. It’s a great place to start - but we can also see a much bigger missional picture.

Many people, when looking at this area often only see those children with ADHD, Autistic Spectrum disorders and dyspraxia, and although these are important, those with other conditions and disabilities are often forgotten. We want to raise awareness in ALL areas of additional needs and disabilities and make sure our churches are open and accessible. A safe place where they can belong.

What can you do?

You can join the conversation and spread it - Gossip this stuff around - Kids with additional needs and disabilities matter!

We have a facebook group  a twitter account (@A_N_All) and an email address (On the flier to stop spammers getting hold of it!)

We are planning more forums - join the facebook group or contact us for more dates.

Link to a copy of the flier below here

*This is a Children Matter! initiative. Currently run by an Urban Saints and Children Worldwide partnership

Euthanasia for Children

Last December, history was made in Brussels.

Twin brothers opted to be euthanized together.

The two men, 45, from the Antwerp region were both born deaf and sought euthanasia after finding that they would also soon go blind.

It’s not just the fact that they were twins. The Telegraph said that “The case is unusual because neither of the men was terminally ill nor suffering physical pain.”

The paper then went on to report that  “Just days after the twins were killed by doctors, Belgium's ruling Socialists tabled a new legal amendment that will allow the euthanasia of children and Alzheimer's sufferers.” (You can read the full article here)

The rules in Brussels currently state that euthanasia can go ahead if “the person wishing to end their life is able to make their wishes clear and a doctor judges that they are suffering unbearable pain”.

After this news, there will be many Christians reaching for their pens to write to their MEPs. That’s good. But can I put something else to you.

If we as Christians are going to complain and attempt to make euthanasia illegal - especially when it comes to children with disabilities, we also need to look at helping to provide a viable alternative - or at least try to understand why people find this to be the only alternative to living with illness and pain.

These Issues Are Not Always Cut And Dried

Look at this from the point of view of a young person with disabilities. 

This is what they often see ahead of them:

• They see adults with disabilities having all financial help withdrawn because of cuts in disability allowances feeling that the only way out is suicide.
• They see older friends struggling with inadequate provision of care, where the carer due to come and help them doesn’t even turn up, or if they do turn up, barely having time to help get them up. 
• They see friends who have opted for supported living accommodation being abused or not adequately cared for.
• Some can’t see themselves having an amazing future, getting married or having kids of their own. 
• Some can’t see themselves getting jobs - especially since much of the support that used to be supplied to help them in the work place has been removed in this latest round of cuts.
• They read comments from high profile people making comments about “aborting babies with defects”.
• If they know they are going to need care into adulthood, the prospects can look bleak. They don’t see that for some it works out - because for the majority it doesn’t.

All of this can compound the feeling that they are a drain on society and have no right to be alive.

The Natural Next Step?

Can you see why they might take up the option of euthanasia? Surely it's the next logical step?

In health care, children are already allowed to make informed choices about their own care - and that is good. Why is it so unbelievable that the natural next step would be opting for euthanasia?

The Reality

Let’s look at it from another angle. 

For some babies who are born with such severe issues that they cannot live for many weeks without invasive care, and then in considerable pain, it is not unusual for only palliative care to be given. 

This decision is reached along side parents and isn’t the default position on care. When is it decided to treat them, the baby only usually lives a matter of weeks longer and often in a lot of discomfort. I have been a nurse caring for babies in both situations and both are agony for the parents.

If you want to take your campaigning to the extreme - you have to consider these situations too. What support can we give in both cases?

As a nurse I looked after a youngster from birth to death. Just over a year. Her issues were severe and her parents decided they couldn’t cope and put her up for adoption. She never got out of hospital. She was assigned foster parents, but fostering a child who is permanently in hospital never works.

Her life was all about keeping her alive at all costs, even though it was agony for her. Eventually - after much talk, it was decided to give only basic care (Nutrition and cuddles). Her first smile was in my arms as she passed peacefully away, free of needles and uncomfortable plastic oxygen head boxes. Was that wrong? If you think it was - please go and hold a child in obvious pain 24/7 because we insist on keeping them alive….just because we can. Can you, as a Christian provide the extra support needed if this course of action wasn't taken?

I am against euthanasia, but if if you are going to campaign on the right to life….. We need to consider these things too. 

Campaign by all means, but be careful. 

Consider all the options and remember - we also need to provide an alternative. Our churches need to be up to the task of helping practically and providing the much needed pastoral support too.

The church, Savile and Child Protection

The newspapers, TV and social media have been alive with information about Jimmy Savile. We all agree it’s terrible, and we’re all wondering how he managed to get away with so much for so long. 

In the early days of this news breaking some people pontificated about why the “Alleged Victims” waited until after he was dead - that comment on it’s own shows how many people just don’t understand the issues facing those who have been abused by a high profile person (Will I be believed? They are so powerful, I’ve been threatened etc). 

As it turns out, a few of his victims did speak up - but sadly, for many reasons, nothing was done.

But I’m not writing here about the failings of all those involved in this, people and policies that should have kept so many young people safe. I want to talk about how “The Church” is going to respond to it.

The temptation is to shake our heads sadly and assume it only happens “out there” and not in our nice comfortable churches.

I commented on social media last week that ‘The Church’ in this nation should “...sit up, listen, take note and learn. Most importantly... Act.”

By act I mean three things: 

1. Act - have a safeguarding policy, it will go a long way to preventing abuse. 
2. Act - If someone makes an allegation, do something about it. Your safeguarding policy will tell you what to do. 

3. Act - If you have a survivor of abuse in your church family, support them. If you don’t  know how, then get some training.

I want the church in this nation to learn from the mistakes behind the whole Savile saga.. 

It’s wrong to think it wouldn’t happen in a loving church community - it can. To think that is wrong. Sadly, I know all too well how people in leadership in churches can ‘get away with it’ and how the victims can be left feeling they have no voice. I know survivors...and those who didn’t survive.

NEVER say NEVER! 

It could even happen in a church with a very good safeguarding policy - CRB checks are good, but not foolproof. We always need to be on our guard. I’m not saying we should view everyone with suspicion before we’ve even welcomed a child into our churches - that would be wrong. What I AM saying is - be aware and be ready - just in case.

Church - please listen. 

Make sure you have an up to date safe guarding policy, and then make sure you use it. Don’t just leave it on the shelf gathering dust. 

Make sure everyone in your church knows about it. Do safeguarding training regularly for those involved at any level with children and young people.

Inform the parents of children who attend your clubs that you have a policy - put a statement about it in all your information.

Display the child line phone number at child eye height in your church buildings, and if any one says you should’t do this because it encourages false allegations - ignore them. I’d rather see the complainer ignored than a child who has been abused. (Aside from that - it’s just not true)

As well as the usual checks, use supervision as one of your main safeguarding tools.

Have a clear and simple whistle blowing policy

Don’t brush things under the carpet - shine God’s light on stuff and act (Whilst still maintaining confidentiality for the child/young person) 

Don’t use this as an excuse NOT to do children’s work or youth work. If it stops your children and youth work - you’re doing something wrong.

If you know nothing about safeguarding, have never heard of child protection but want to do do something - contact the professionals for help - they’ll be happy to help you.

I’ll say it again:  Church, please...sit up, listen, take note and learn. Most importantly... Act.

When Children Don't Want Jesus In Their Heart Any More

We adults have our own view of all things theological, we like to get it sorted in our heads and pass on what we think to the children. Sometimes we’ve wrestled with it ourselves, and sometimes we have just accepted what the previous generation told us - because we have never been required to test it for ourselves. Sometimes we forget to let the children wrestle with it for themselves, to ask questions - and not be afraid to ask them.

Many people are shocked when children question, as though we think they are rejecting all the wisdom we have passed on because of their questioning. But questioning is healthy. It helps a child to own their faith and grow in it as they journey, rather than getting to university and thinking “So why do I believe this….?”

I’ve written on the subject of how children view suffering and God before, and had a lot of theology thrown at me as a result. There were lot’s of different views, some of the readers rather surprised that I needed this subject explaining to me and set about trying to ‘correct’ my theology. I didn’t need it explaining or correcting - I never said I did. What I did question was how we help children who are suffering, as I felt they needed it explaining rather better than we do! I felt we should’t be saying  “this is the answer - lump it”, but rather - “these are different ways of looking at it” and giving space and permission for anger and grief, a place for asking questions of both us and God.

Last time I wrote on this I talked of how I have had angry conversations with God about things and I got responses from readers along the lines of “Until I accept that these things are God will...then…. etc, etc” I was cross with these responses - and I have a firm faith. So just think how a questioning child would feel with this response?!

I have seen the faith of too many children smashed to pieces because of poorly thought through theology pressed on the child when they are not in a place to hear it. To tell a child who has just lost their mother that they should be happy for their mother - because they are in heaven is crass beyond words….. but I’ve heard it said! The same child was told within days of losing her, that their mother’s death was God’s will. Ok - that might be your theology, but please don’t say it to a child who’s mother died in a car crash days before.

During my first year as a children’s evangelist I had a 7 year old girl in a small group. She was a Christian, but struggling with coming to terms with some horrible stuff happening in her life. I will never forget her screaming at me, whilst grabbing at her chest repeatedly; “I don’t want God in my heart any more, I hate Him, I hate Him, He doesn’t work”

Sometimes there comes a time when we have to stop trying to explain God’s reasoning (Only God knows that!) and just hold the child and cry with them….. And not be afraid to admit that we just don’t understand. That’s what I did.

After I have cried with them and allowed them to shout - I don’t try to explain God…. Or make excuses for Him - that’s not for me to do. What I can do is help them to hold on to God in the middle of their crisis. I will talk theology (What God thinks about it) when they are ready - and want to talk about.

What I want for them is to find God in the depths of the pain, to give them the resources to eventually allow God to redeem the situation, to hold them and to comfort them. Before we can say anything else, they need to know more than anything that God still loves them - even in the depths of their despair and angry questions - they are within that love. 

Think of the song ‘Father God I Wonder’. I love that song - but have you ever tried to sing the chorus from the middle of a deep crisis? When the last thing we want to do is ‘Sing God’s praises’? It’s difficult to do - especially when told that this is “God’s Will”. But it seems we expect kids to happily do this.

With older kids, and this song in mind I have sometimes talked through the occasions I have sung it, not wanting to praise God, and yet at the same time - determined to praise Him, just because I am still aware of God’s love. The gritted teeth, hands clenched, tears streaming down your cheeks version where you sing “I WILL sing your praises”. This is usually called a ‘sacrifice of praise’ and it’s not easy, but it is often the first step to allowing God into the grief and the pain.

It’s good to share your story - not to say that you understand, because you can’t…. They are not you. Tell it to say “You are not alone, you can talk to me”.

I am not a professional counselor - but like many of those who work with children, I am often the first contact for a child in crisis. I will always suggest counseling to parents, but I am also aware that my initial response to the child is key to gaining their trust for the future.

You’ve probably guessed where my theology on suffering sits :o) Your theology may sit in a different place, and that’s fine by me. 

The purpose of this blog post is not to compare theology or war scars - it’s to fight for the faith of the children I love and serve.

Beyond the Paralympics

Over the next couple of weeks we will all be ooo-ing and aaah-ing over the achievements of those taking part in the Paralympics. It’s all nice and warm and fuzzy - and why should’t it be?! This is something to be celebrated, and I for one will be watching as much as my work load allows.

There is work going on amongst para-church organisations to use the Paralympics to raise awareness of disability in churches - going beyond the ramp and a warm welcome, but actually including those with disabilities and additional needs fully in the life of the church.

But what happens when it’s all over? For a while, we will be inspired. To quote the Olympic catch phrase, a generation will have been inspired too. But for how long?

Here’s some things that may take this inspiration beyond the Paralympics:

• The Disability Sunday pack - written to be used during the event, but easily used on any day. It may fit better at a different time of year for your church, or you may have only just found out about it, but please - use it. 
• The Enabling Church study book - ideal for churches who wanted to take a fresh look at what the Bible has to say about disability and become equipped to be more inclusive. 
• I know of another book currently going through the editorial process - one that I have had the privilege of writing one of the chapters for. I’ll give you more information when I have it. 
• Have a look at the Livability page "Your Church And Disability" 

Also:

• Scripture Union do ‘Additional Needs’ camps (The link takes you to the camps just gone - but you can request a brochure for next year) 
• My own organisation (Children Worldwide) will be doing a weekend retreat for families who have a child with complex medical needs and mobility difficulties. See the page about "Latitude" 
• Both Urban Saints and Children Worldwide have people who can run a training event for churches who want to know more about children with additional needs and disabilities. 
• Churches for All have contacts who would be happy to come a do training on any aspect of disability for your church. Have a good look around this new look web site 
• If you want to see a good example of disability information on a website, have a look at the National Space Centre in Leicester - the info is helpful and clear and the centre itself is completely accessible and welcoming. Let’s get the churches in the UK doing this even better! 

And books for Kids:

• Some fantastic Books by Victoria Beech and the Paediatric Chaplaincy Network (Scroll down the page when you get there). Tackling subjects such as life limiting illness, hospital stays and the death of a sibling.
• And one little gem I've just found - Rebecca Elliott: "Just Because"

Are We Inspiring a Generation?

For the first time ever, the catch phrase for the Olympics and the Paralympics is the same: “Inspire a Generation”. It’s a good phrase!

All over the world, the younger generation are being inspired by positive role models who are competing in the Olympics, and the same will happen when it comes to the Paralympics. The torch is being passed on to the next generation. (I loved that bit of the opening ceremony!)

I hope that all of this rising generation will be inspired by both events. That not just disabled youngsters but also able bodied youngsters will be inspired by the Paralympics.

But what about us as a ‘Church’? 

Are we inspiring a generation? Any generation?

For all the children and young people in our churches, disabled or not, additional need or not, are we inspiring them to go forward in their faith? Are we giving good role models for them? Are we inspiring an older generation of people who have disabilities to go forward with God? Do we even have a vision for this?

How do we see those with disabilities and additional needs and are they even on the Church’s radar? Sadly, for most churches they are not. When you look at the figures of how many people there are with disabilities in our communities, it is easy to see that our churches do not reflect those figures….. And it’s not because they all get healed!

When the world is watching the abilities of the Paralympians rather than their disabilities and applauding their achievements, how is ‘the Church’ viewing those with disabilities in their communities? Are they seen as people who can be giants of faith, able to serve as well as receive? Or is it a case of a perplexed “what disabled people….?”

I’ve been speaking out for children who have disabilities and additional needs for over 20 years, and in the area of children - inspired by a generation of children’s workers, things are happening. More and more churches are trying to include youngsters with disabilities and additional needs. For these people I am extremely grateful -  they truly are inspiring a generation of children with disabilities and additional needs and building them up in their faith. But what happens as our children grow up? Do we have the same heart and vision in our youth and adult programmes?

Maybe as these children grow, the Church will sit up and realise that something needs to be done, to see that working with these young people and adults is a valid ministry. I believe that our churches need to be ready to welcome those with disabilities rather than being surprised when they come. I want those with leadership responsibilities to look at this issue properly rather than skip over info and posts about disability.... as seems to be the norm! (Apologies for my outspoken moment there - but that is how it feels to many people who have disabilities and try to access our churches)

Why not raise awareness about this in our churches now? With the Paralympics, the idea of disability will be high in people’s minds. And this is the thinking behind moving “Disability Sunday” to just after the event.

Have a look here for a ‘Disability Sunday’ pack, and look at inspiring your church to be a Gold medal holder for accessibility.... on all levels.... in all generations.

Recruiting to a vision

Special Needs, additional needs, disabilities, difficulties - what ever you call it, the issue in a lot of our churches is the same, and many children and youth workers up and down the country are struggling with it. 

We see the problem, and all the surrounding issues and feel that gut response of “How on earth am I going to cope with that?” All the work of doing week by week youth ministry is hard enough to cope with without this!

There is often an expectation for our volunteers to deliver a level of inclusion that even the most experienced specialist in the area of additional needs would struggle to do outside the church setting, and when it doesn’t work we get disillusioned. 

To practice a good level of inclusion is a week by week process, and how it works out in practice will be different for every child. Some will settle in with all the other kids, some won’t. Some will need a mix of time in the group and time alone. Whatever we plan could change at a moments notice and we need lots of flexibility.

To agree to help a child with learning difficulties in our Sunday children’s work at age five is one thing, but to transition them through our children and youth work and into adult worship is something completely different. It is a long term commitment that needs determination, love, wisdom and vision, and is a decision not to be taken lightly - it will be hard work.

Doesn’t that sound awful! 

Ok, let’s begin with another way of looking at this? Let’s move our eyes away from the problem we perceive and onto the gift we can give. On to a vision of what God can do, not only in the lives of the children and young people, but in our own lives as we seek to serve them. 

Don’t misunderstand me here - we need to look at practicalities, how to make the provision we give work. We need to make sure our volunteers are trained and ready too. But if our starting point is the problem and not God, where is our vision coming from? God needs to be central in the vision - for all we do, and especially in the work we do with these precious youngsters

You will no doubt be familiar the following statement: “Mum has asked if Fred can come to club…. Have you seen Fred?! He can’t sit still, he hates the noise and he’s totally disruptive. He’s always putting the other kids off! We need a one to one for him”. After that comes the conversation with a possible one to one buddy: “We have this child who is a problem. He’s totally disruptive in his class. Would you mind helping us out?”  This is what I call “recruiting to a problem”.

Wouldn’t it be better to say “We have a young person who is struggling with club at the moment. We want him to have a positive experience and want to find ways of helping him connect with God and be all that God wants him to be. Would you help us?” This is “recruiting to a vision”

What do I see when I look at a child with autism? Or severe ADHD? Do I see a problem to be solved or a child, made by God, who deserves to be loved and nurtured? Do I have a passion for seeing God work in their lives?

One of our Trustees was telling the story of a friend last week, who got to the point of saying to God “I don’t know what to do!” And God responded with “I know - watch me!”

It was different circumstances, but the lesson is the same.

Even before we start planning - should we be saying “Lord I don’t know what to do! Guide me!”

We need a vision and a passion for these children. It won’t be one vision and one plan for life - it will change and will be constantly moving with the young person. It isn’t a one size fits all - it’s a different long term vision and a different plan for every young person and every family.

The over-riding and central vision will be the same - That they would know and love God, that they would be all that God wants them to be, that they would be filled with the Spirit and serve God with all their heart, mind and soul….. I could go on! But there will be things God lays on your heart for a specific child that goes beyond the basic vision you have for all the kids.

May your vision and your passion increase as you continue to serve God and the youngsters in your care.

Some tips:

Don’t do it yourself if you are the key youth worker - appoint someone whose sole responsibility is ‘Inclusion’. Someone with experience, who is passionate…. and has a vision.

Recruit team to a vision, not a problem.

Be realistic about what you can achieve

Work with the young persons family to achieve the best for them

Remember that what works one week, might not work next week